It was a bright blustery day in downtown Newington this past Friday, and as you can see, all of the well oiled business geese were gathered at the first hole trying to decide who should go first.
There was a cacophony of shrill voices screaming that they should be the first ones on the tee.
"Mother! Mother! I'm the golden goose that laid the golden egg! I should be the first to go!"
"Not him mother, Henrietta should be the one to go first, as she's the one whose the dimmest bulb around, with her southern drawl of "yes" polluting the sky!"
"How dare you! How dare you! How dare you!" said Greta, who always wanted to be the center of attention, thus demanding that she go first, because she was the pluckiest duck that sailed the seas.
"But wait, if I don't go first, then the sky will fall without waiting for more!" cackled the twins Chicken and Billy, who never agreed on anything.
But Dudley Do-Goose was having none of it. He stepped on his pet feather named "Feather' and began screeching "Nell! Nell!"
"But Mother, Mother!" crooned a goose named Paulina, "They're just screeching some silly love songs, you should allow me to tee off first, because I'm the goose on the run!"
"Nonsense Mother, none of those others are worth it, because I can hit the ball like a walrus," said Johanna in a tone dripping with sour apples.
"Everybody, just stop being valley girls!" yelled Mother to all of her inventions. "I had enough of you all clicking those zircon encrusted tweezers, you're giving me a major league headache! Now sit back, stand in line and wait for your tune to come around. Do I make myself clearer than a country road deep in the heart of Texas?"
So, with great reluctance and malice of forethought, they all stood in line at the first tee to patiently wait for their turn to walk out of the green room and onto the green in order to act like the sultan of swing.
Ore, in this case, like the farmer who gleefully allows his cows to be used to play a rousing game of "pick the square that will be the winner winner poultry dinner!"
A good time was had by all....except the humans who had to play hopscotch while walking around the park that day.
Oh yes, geese are so prolific in the poop department!
ReplyDeleteEspecially in our town park. Off to the immediate left there was a flock of about 100 doing their thing on the ball field, then in a further section of the park about a 1/2 mile away from that picture is a soccer field (heavily used) that gets regularly coated by those birds. Ughhh.
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