Episode #240: And You Are Called?

Books By G.B. Miller

Today's pic is a 100% honest attempt at promotion. This novella is my latest release, a dark fast paced rural/urban fantasy that doesn't slow down until the end. Available at most major e-tailers in e-book and print. Click the link for further details.

There are three things that I absolutely loathe as a writer: 1} picking a title for a story; 2} writing blurbs for a completed book and 3} choosing characters names.

As much as I would love to rant about my trials and tribulations in picking character names (and there are a lot) today's post will be about my trials and tribulations in picking story titles.

Now, I don't know about you, but I've always, ALWAYS, had problems in choosing/brainstorming titles for my stories. More often than not, the titles that I pick for stories would often have absolutely nothing to do whatsoever with the story whatsoever.

One example, the original title for the novella that you see standing before you. Prior to the final title that you see, I originally went through almost seven different iterations of what this story was known, and I only remember what the previous title to this novella was, "Blackness In The White Sand". Could not remember why I came up with that title originally and it took me over 8 years to come up with the title that you see before you, and I had to use the very sound advice of a writer's group to help me come up with that.

Another good example of a very bad title was the original title of my adult fiction novel The Inner Sibling, which was Line 21. This was a title that absolutely no one understood the meaning behind it. Twelve years later, even I came to the conclusion it was a crappy title. For those who are curious, the original title refers to the old version of the 1040A form, in which line 21 is where you put the amount of miscellaneous income that you had earned for the year.

Now let me give you a couple of examples of titles that I had given to some short stories of mine. Red Stripe and The Right Thing. The former story is featured in my collection called What Is Life? and it tells the story about a day in the life of a punk rock musician. Why I titled the story after a bottle of beer is anybody's guess, because the story has absolutely nothing to do with beer. The latter story is about a day in the life of a guy who was cheated on by his girl with another girl, and it uses the backdrop of a town festival for the story to unfold. Why? Your guess is as good as mine. The latter story can be found in my collection called A Trilogy of Love, which is actually a replacement title for the same collection under the name Broken Promises.

Now to the present. When I had originally started my current project, which has the blog tag Hot Mess, it was called Dandelion Tears. Again, I have absolutely no idea as to why I had chosen that title to begin with. I mean, it's mentioned very briefly as a place of employment for one of the characters, but that's about it. I have, however, come up with a working theory as to why I choose bizarre titles for my stories: I simply latch onto a particular word, regardless whether it actually applies to a story, and viola! it becomes a title for a story.

However you want to break it down, the real challenge, at least for this series, is to come up with an overall title for the series. My saving grace this time around is that because I have the four volumes broken down by events {kidnapping, 1st recovery attempt at a campsite, 2nd recovery attempt is a pitched battle, and the final recovery attempt takes place at the place} I will have no problem it titleing those four volumes.

Literally, my entire writing journey is littered with stories that have absolute crap titles that I now have to rectify with brand new titles, and it hasn't been easy. I have succeeded in renaming a previously published story with one that actually makes sense, while another novella desperately needs one beyond the placeholder of the "Average American Novella". In addition to those messes, I have nearly three dozen short stories from my defunct short story blog that needs new titles so that I can create new collections.

Basically, I suck at picking out titles for my stories, because apparently I subscribe to the bizarre philosophy that some musicians apply to their works, which is to pick a nonsensical title for the c.d.'s, which leaves everyone collectively scratching their heads trying to decipher the reasoning {example: The Boomtown Rats, who had that cult hit "I Don't Like Mondays" titled their album "The Fine Art of Surfacing", which contains that cult hit}. I guess you can call me "The Muddler" when it comes to story titles, because my muddle choices often make no sense to anyone, including myself.

Happy Monday to one and all, and remember just because the world doesn't revolve around you, you can take comfort in the knowledge that people used to believe that the Sun revolved around the Earth.

{c} 2024 by G.B. Miller. All Rights Reserved

Episode #239: The Return Of The....Picture Blog!

Back in the day, during the fertile time period of my blogging {mid-2010's}, I decided to create a picture blog. I had recently become enamored with basic point/shoot photography {aka disposable cameras}, so I decided to create a picture blog called Pictures For Smarties! It functioned quite well for a short number of years, 2010-16, before I decided to move on to other things. 

The reason for giving everyone the very abbreviated back story is two fold: one, I need to publish a blog post and two, my brain decided to take an involuntary thinking break as it applies to blogging.

In regards to the latter, we originally came up with three topics to write about. The first was another deep dive into my writing process, but after two pages in, I realized that I had covered the topic in other blog posts, so it was becoming blatantly redundant; the second topic was to riff on a previous blog post about my muse, but after writing just the title on a sheet of blank notebook paper, my muse hit me {gently} with a cat o'nine tails and stated very succinctly that this would work better as a short story. I agreed, so I wrote a sticky and put it with a folder of other potential short story ideas; the third topic was to do a "abnormal review" but I quickly shot it down the moment I wrote Abnormal Review on the paper.

The next day, while munching on breakfast, the idea of resurrecting my picture blog, at least for this week, was looking very, very feasible. I had accumulated a lot of random slice-of-life pics, and using them for an emergency blog post such as this one, made a lot of sense.

So, without further ado and after a nearly 8 year hiatus, I bring to you a fresh new post from my picture blog, and depending on the response I receive, I may add a few more to the mix in the coming weeks/months.

Pictures For Smarties!

{c} 2024 by G.B. Miller. All Rights Reserved

Episode #238: If You've Seen A Publisher's Advert In CyberSpace, Just Lock Your Wallet

...Is the object that all writers want to be over with when their creations comes to fruition.

This post is more of a warning about those "publishing ads" that you see pop up {mostly} on Facebook either in your front page feed or your normal page feed(s), that promise you everything and only deliver a bold red negative to your bank account with nothing else to show for it.

So what we're going to do today is dissect one of those typical 'publishing ads" that have made their quarterly appearance in my feed, and hopefully by the end of this post, you'll be a more fully informed and just shade more cynical when it comes to the business side of writing.

First a brief writing update: I just finished transcribing chapters 96-98 of my four volume series with the working title of Hot Mess. This brings the total word count to about 479k+/-

Issue #1: they promise that your book can be on all kinds of national best sellers lists if you use their service. No, just no. Anyone who says that to you is outright lying. In order to get on a national best seller list (e.g. NYT, USA, Amazon or B&N), you actually have to work at your craft, build an audience and have people purchase your book, either day of or as a pre-order.

Issue #2: paying to get your book published. Again, just no. Most of these companies are offering packages that start @ $399 (the ad that I'm referencing has packages that start @ $4999, and a lot of what is included are superficial at best and rip-offs at worse. The concrete rule that you should always be aware of is that you do not pay a "publisher" to publish your book. You can actually publish your book for free on reputable publishing platforms (I'll elaborate further in a moment).

Issue #3: when the ad says they have years of experience, chances are excellent that they're lying. This is how you can tell: clicking on their FB page brings up an equal amount of likes and follows (usually starts at 4k for both types); clicking on the "about" tab brings up their page transparency info, which for this particular page that I'm using has a born on date of January 23, 2024, and that their page manager is located in Pakistan (Pakistan seems to be the new Philippines); and their business location is either in California or New York.

Issue #4: they answer your posted questions via a DM to your in box. It's usually a link to their generic website that has all kinds of expensive useless goodies that only help their bottom line and not yours. Let's look at their website, shall we?

Issue #5: their website is quite generic, the pictures look like stock images and the reviews are often five stars and months out of date. If you try searching the various links, you get lots of descriptions that are deliberately vague on details like cost. Which you have to contact them in order to find out the particulars. 

Issue #6: their company name is a borderline ripoff of actual reputable companies. You will find an ungodly amount of these "publishers" who use variations of B&N, KDP/Amazon or even the variations of the Big Five publishing houses as part of their company's names. Another concrete rule to remember is that no traditional/self-publishing platform will actually solicit for your business like that. It's more like you go to them.

Issue #7: is not really an issue but a reality check on how you should spend your hard earned money if you choose to go the self-publishing route {remember later? this is later}. Talk to any reputable writer that you know that happens to be either a true indie or a genuine hybrid (that is, publishes their work both trad and indie) and ask them for tips on what you need to do in order to successfully self-publish.

Most, if not all, will state that you need to spend your money wisely on a good/reputable graphic designer for your book covers (as in print and e-book) and other assorted essentials (e.g. actual usable marketing materials); a good formatter, (print, ebook & Kindle) if you don't fancy doing it yourself; and most importantly, a good quality editor, who specializes in most editing practices. A quality editor is well worth the price you pay for their services (most start around $450).

In general, these three major items should cost you roughly $1300+/- out of pocket. For reference, the company that I used for covers has base packages at $100, $200 and $400 (plus other tangibles that are well worth looking into); the company that I used for formatting has a fiction package deal of $300 for two e-book files and a PDF.; and the last time two times that I had used an editor (including this one), cost me $500 & $600 respectfully.

There are other tangibles where the cost is much lower: registering your US copyright starts @ $60. This is a fixed rate that US Copyright office charges; you can purchase ISBN numbers directly from the company that produces them, or you can use the FREE ones that each platform provides to you.

As for reputable publishing platforms, the king has been Amazon/KDP, followed by Draft2Digital, ITunes/Apple, and Ingram/Sparks to name a few. Their royalty splits, which is how they make their money, starts on a 70-30 split (that is 70% you and 30% them). The second one and last one mention provide distribution to other retailers, free of charge. And as always, read the ToS for each platform.

In essence, you shouldn't be paying any money to any of these so-called "publishers" because all you get is nothing in return. I haven't even touched up on other marketing aspects, because that's whole other animal, but some of the platforms mentioned, do allow you to market/promote your books for a modest up front fee. Even FB charges a modest starting rate if you wish to advertise with them.

What it boils down to is this: do your research on any ads that pop-up in your feed, because why should you throw away your hard earned money for an end product that could turn out to be garbage.

Have a fantastic week!

    

{c} 2024 by G.B. Miller. All Rights Reserved

Episode #237: I Worship At The Altar Of My Muse

This pic was taken during the second to last vacation (early 2010?) that I had decided to treat myself and the wife to. This glass tower is located at the Indianapolis Children's Museum. This was a suggestion made to me by a long time online friend. Indiana is a cool state, and I would love to get back there again someday.

I am very attached {to the proverbial hip} to my muse. If my muse had a thematic entrance, her music would be Judas Priest's The Electric Eye. My muse can simply give me a look that would make me shrink in fear and grovel at the bottom of her knee high leather boots.

You might be wondering, "G.B., what gives? How can a simple literary muse have such a stranglehold on your entire being?"

It's a bit complicated to explain, but I will give it the old William T. Sherman's March to The Sea try. 

To start, my muse is an amalgamation of the many wonderful women that I have/had the pleasure of crossing paths with in the past 40+ years of living/working the good life. All of these fine people had character/personality traits that I had come to admire, and when I started my blogging/writing journey in 2008, the first thing that I needed was a muse. A muse that contained the traits/qualities that I had most admired/appreciated among the women who had crossed my path. A muse, that most importantly to me, was female.

Now I know that sounds mighty strange, or to quote a former co-worker of mine, "You're weird sir.", but truth be told, I've always felt comfortable writing stories from a woman's perspective, which originally showed itself into having strong women and, to use a crass modern term, soy boys. But as I slowly improved my writing skills, the soy boy characters gradually fell by the wayside, and were replaced by male characters that were incredibly nuanced to the point of normalcy.

With the back story out of the way, we move on to the meat of the post: my muse. My muse has influenced my writing in numerous ways, ranging from having a light touch/influence to using a crowbar to muscle their way in, kick me out of the chair and perform a coup d'etat on my person {in the early years of my blogging, I wrote some nifty free-from blog posts, like this one featuring my muse, that largely involved random acts of humorous violence against myself}. In general, she has been my guiding light to how I write my female characters and story scenes.

She has given me solid advice throughout the years, mostly in the form of research. Whether it's been observational nudges {aka people watching} or delicate questioning of others about certain...things, she has been my literary anchor to all of my endeavors. She has managed to nudge me out of my comfort zone by adding certain real world elements to my stories.

With my current series, she has managed to really show me what she's theoretically made of. No matter what idea I'd managed to come up with, she was able, through the sheer force of her personality, show me how to properly work it in without it coming out like a bad screenplay for a bad...movie.

Note: before my muse found her footing, I wrote really, really bad stories that were more suited as outlines for adult movies.

So, she helped me flesh out the concept of a matriarchal monarchy with a devilish twist; a predominately female protagonists/antagonists story line; clothing and other types of accessorizing; and at least a half dozen other concepts, ranging from pre-modern to modern to futuristic/steampunk. In short, with her traveling the path more congested, thus more varied, she has turned herself into a force to be reckoned with. She has gained my trust so completely that I find myself inserting slivers of her being into some of the characters that I write about.

My muse does not have a name, per se, only descriptive pronouns that actually make sense to normal people. But she has earned my respect just the same, which is why she gets to go on mini-vacations to all of the sunny Oceanic hot spots whenever I take a break to do transcription.

This is the story of my literary muse, a vivacious lady with the attitude to match. We all should have a muse that propels us to do better with our writing, no matter what the gender may be.

{c} 2024 by G.B. Miller. All Rights Reserved